Marriage Tidbits--the good, honest, and funny
Today's topic--marriage. I plan on sharing some random stuff about marriage--not because I am an expert--just because I have enjoyed my marriage for the past almost 16 years and it is fun to talk about!
1. I think the absolute most important factor to the success of your marriage is that both folks love God more than each other! You see, on those days you want to let your flesh take over you have the Holy Spirit to guide you and give you the strength to restrain (you know--crucify yourself). And on those days you actually do act like the devil himself...well, you repent--and ask forgiveness--from our Creator and our spouse! It means swallowing pride, humbling ourself and just admitting we blew it! And because your spouse loves God, he/she will remember those verses about forgiveness, mercy and grace...and everyone lives in Christian harmony and peace! Ha--that sounds easy and I got a little satirical at the end. The truth is when you are both truly about living for Christ it just makes it much easier! If you aren't focused on Him, bitterness, anger, disgust and all things yuck can set in.
2. Laugh at each other! Be able to laugh at yourself with your spouse--you know you just act like a fool sometimes...and we'll, it's funny. Johnny and I were trying to navigate through Memphis one day (before GPS) and he kept demanding I tell him tell him where to turn that second. I took that map I was holding and just ripped it to shreds all over the car while I was screaming at him. He just looked at me, looked forward as he stopped at a red light and solemnly said, "I wonder what those people next to us think is going on." At that point, we just laughed! And we did eventually get to our destination without the map!
3. Help each other! Look at this ladies...
This happened in our kitchen tonight! Share responsibilities! Sometimes one will do more than the other--big deal! Just a funny about supper tonight--first of all, it was great--meatball stroganoff, green beans and yeast rolls--Jackson took a bite of his green beans and started running around the room saying its HOT! After he drank his tea, he said, " daddy put hot sauce in those beans!" Actually, he went to put a little pepper in them but the large opening was open--and it resulted in some pretty spicy beans! After listening to his dad's explanation, Jackson said "I no want to eat those beans. Daddy's mean!" And I just found the irony in this picture--I say share responsibilities as I take a picture of Johnny cooking--I must confess-I was sitting on the couch! Do as I say, not as I model :)
4. Always talk good about your spouse. If you are always criticizing, complaining about, and saying negative mess, well...I can guarantee you communicate that same mess to your spouse with your actions. None of us are perfect and we all have irritating personality traits and/or habits! Make it a point to talk about the good things!
5. Have fun---TOGETHER! What do you both enjoy--for us, it is outdoor activities--hiking, biking, camping in a tent, mountains, walking,...even when he is kayaking on the Ocoee I get to take pictures, sit and think deep thoughts as I stare at the beauty of the river, read...it is just fun! I wish my skills were up to the Ocoee level, but they just aren't! Well, maybe I could--I am just scared--I can roll! I had a near death experience on the Nantahala River and have had a hard time working myself up to trying again on real moving water! Bear Creek has been my limit for the past few years. My goal is to at least go down it by the end of the summer! I hope I don't chicken out! If I do, at least I will be with my man! I mean, JG weighs enough this year to go down the Nanty in a raft--somebody's got to go with him--right? At least I admit I am scared!
6. Just stop life and enjoy each other--walk by her, sweep her off her feet--tell her how beautiful she is and how passionately you love her! Crawl up in his lap and tell him how thankful you are for him and what all he means to you. Send a text, email, make a card, plan a special date...make sure all those life demands (washing clothes, cleaning, cooking, kids homework and practices) don't stop you from communicating and from having sex! Yes I said it--sex! And I am still a Christian!
7. Communicate--effective communication can be a challenge sometimes! I might write more specifically about it in the future, but for now--just know it does NOT happen when you are yelling, blaming, throwing up all the past mistakes, saying things like you "never" or you "always". Be specific--don't leave your spouse guessing--be open and honest!
8. Marriage is an adventure. Johnny Cox
I asked him to add to it--he says it just sounds cool. I agree!
And I have to say, apart from the adventure of following Christ, the adventure of our marriage far surpasses everything else! Go live a meaningful life--invest heavily in your marriage! Protect it--fight for it!
1. I think the absolute most important factor to the success of your marriage is that both folks love God more than each other! You see, on those days you want to let your flesh take over you have the Holy Spirit to guide you and give you the strength to restrain (you know--crucify yourself). And on those days you actually do act like the devil himself...well, you repent--and ask forgiveness--from our Creator and our spouse! It means swallowing pride, humbling ourself and just admitting we blew it! And because your spouse loves God, he/she will remember those verses about forgiveness, mercy and grace...and everyone lives in Christian harmony and peace! Ha--that sounds easy and I got a little satirical at the end. The truth is when you are both truly about living for Christ it just makes it much easier! If you aren't focused on Him, bitterness, anger, disgust and all things yuck can set in.
2. Laugh at each other! Be able to laugh at yourself with your spouse--you know you just act like a fool sometimes...and we'll, it's funny. Johnny and I were trying to navigate through Memphis one day (before GPS) and he kept demanding I tell him tell him where to turn that second. I took that map I was holding and just ripped it to shreds all over the car while I was screaming at him. He just looked at me, looked forward as he stopped at a red light and solemnly said, "I wonder what those people next to us think is going on." At that point, we just laughed! And we did eventually get to our destination without the map!
This happened in our kitchen tonight! Share responsibilities! Sometimes one will do more than the other--big deal! Just a funny about supper tonight--first of all, it was great--meatball stroganoff, green beans and yeast rolls--Jackson took a bite of his green beans and started running around the room saying its HOT! After he drank his tea, he said, " daddy put hot sauce in those beans!" Actually, he went to put a little pepper in them but the large opening was open--and it resulted in some pretty spicy beans! After listening to his dad's explanation, Jackson said "I no want to eat those beans. Daddy's mean!" And I just found the irony in this picture--I say share responsibilities as I take a picture of Johnny cooking--I must confess-I was sitting on the couch! Do as I say, not as I model :)4. Always talk good about your spouse. If you are always criticizing, complaining about, and saying negative mess, well...I can guarantee you communicate that same mess to your spouse with your actions. None of us are perfect and we all have irritating personality traits and/or habits! Make it a point to talk about the good things!
5. Have fun---TOGETHER! What do you both enjoy--for us, it is outdoor activities--hiking, biking, camping in a tent, mountains, walking,...even when he is kayaking on the Ocoee I get to take pictures, sit and think deep thoughts as I stare at the beauty of the river, read...it is just fun! I wish my skills were up to the Ocoee level, but they just aren't! Well, maybe I could--I am just scared--I can roll! I had a near death experience on the Nantahala River and have had a hard time working myself up to trying again on real moving water! Bear Creek has been my limit for the past few years. My goal is to at least go down it by the end of the summer! I hope I don't chicken out! If I do, at least I will be with my man! I mean, JG weighs enough this year to go down the Nanty in a raft--somebody's got to go with him--right? At least I admit I am scared!
6. Just stop life and enjoy each other--walk by her, sweep her off her feet--tell her how beautiful she is and how passionately you love her! Crawl up in his lap and tell him how thankful you are for him and what all he means to you. Send a text, email, make a card, plan a special date...make sure all those life demands (washing clothes, cleaning, cooking, kids homework and practices) don't stop you from communicating and from having sex! Yes I said it--sex! And I am still a Christian!
7. Communicate--effective communication can be a challenge sometimes! I might write more specifically about it in the future, but for now--just know it does NOT happen when you are yelling, blaming, throwing up all the past mistakes, saying things like you "never" or you "always". Be specific--don't leave your spouse guessing--be open and honest!
8. Marriage is an adventure. Johnny Cox
I asked him to add to it--he says it just sounds cool. I agree!
And I have to say, apart from the adventure of following Christ, the adventure of our marriage far surpasses everything else! Go live a meaningful life--invest heavily in your marriage! Protect it--fight for it!
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