A Not So Blissful Day...

First, I just want to say "Wow!" I was completely overwhelmed, humbled, and encouraged from all the responses (public and private) regarding my last post.  I am so grateful that so many of you took the time to read something I wrote-it is indeed humbling. I can't begin to tell you how thankful I am for the calls, texts, private messages, emails, and social media comments that were sent my way.  I want to put them all in one place to look back over in the future. I still hope that by openly sharing my struggle and pain that others will continue to be encouraged.

So what about today?  I guess it all began last night. Johnny attended a training at work recently and received a book.  He has read it and was telling me about some of the principles, etc.  It is about preparing for the ACT/SAT.  He tossed me the book and told me it wouldn't take me long to read it. So, I started reading.  I read half of it last night and finished it up before John woke up this morning.  It had some good suggestions and was helpful to prompt some thoughts as I make an effort to facilitate my kiddos education.  I really took away the principles of diligence and perseverance in regards to EVERYTHING in life-not just education.  So, you know how it is, all you non-fiction readers out there. After reading something you are motivated by the new ideas that it generates and are eager to test them out. Right?

So, here is a summary of the events that proceeded to transpire at the Cox house today.

• Thirty minutes into the field trip that I organized for our homeschool group--I was feeling a little sorry for the kids.  While I was interested in the things the presenter was presenting I felt like the kids were probably a little lost.  He was using lots of high-level business vocabulary and did not do the best job in making the material applicable to his audience.  I just took a deep breath and thought about how the book I just read talked about the importance of vocabulary exposure.  Oh well, at least they were getting some exposure!  But, the last 45 minutes of the presentation/tour was great.  Did you know that the weather chasers' tornado car was made in Tupelo--actually at the Renasant Center by an entrepreneur? We met an illustrator who is currently working on illustrating children's books. He showed us pictures and explained how his business operates. We saw an awesome working contraption/art piece. And we learned how affordable it can be to start a business right in downtown Tupelo. Seriously-I really mean that--I was shocked that rent was so cheap! John Gannon and I left and had a really good discussion about business.  All is well with the day...  (I really did enjoy the trip today and am very grateful for the presenter. It really did spark some stuff within JG and I.)
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• When we get home, we start tackling a little spelling.  If John wer riting tis it wuld lok sumting like thes. (If John were writing this it would look something like this.) With dyslexia, he struggles with being able to accurately pronounce and enunciate sounds.  So, he writes exactly how he hears the sounds--which are generally not correct when he tries to break down a word. Needless to say, spelling is a struggle. I didn't touch it at all last year due to his struggle with reading. He had improved leaps and bounds so we have started tackling the spelling this year.  He has made some progress but remembering sound patterns from one day to the next is a struggle. Today--I have no clue what was happening.  For example, he may write kit and then scit (instead of skit).  I repeated the same instruction to him I know at least 10 different times.  We did an activity with a magnet wand and sounds--we exaggerated sounds...I mean we made an effort.  When I noticed he was getting frustrated, we took a break. When we returned it was on--the tears, whining, almost setting the page on fire from the eraser friction...I have a nice calm discussion/pep talk about perseverance. How it takes discipline to learn things that do not come naturally to us. I told stories about his dad learning to play the guitar. How is hands would be sore and cracked. How awful his first song was...but he kept on until he learned.  I even shared a story I read in "the book." Remember the book I read.  Well--all that fell on deaf ears...still more whining, complaining, and then the occasional 8 year old smart aleck comments started arriving...I just took deep breaths. Stay calm, stay calm, stay calm I mentally reminded myself.
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• Then here comes math.  It was really a review of what we have been doing all month.  After reading the first problem he screams, "I can't do this." I calmly asked him to explain to me what he knows and doesn't know about the problem. "I can't do this because I don't know how much the fish costs!!!!" (lots of ! points mean it was said with passion). The tears start coming again, his face and upper body collapse onto the table, deep moans proceed. He then lifts his head and bangs it a few times onto the book.  Huh? I am at a loss at this point. He very disrespectfully tells me how he doesn't know how much the fish cost.  I calmly just ask if he has looked at the directions.  "I know what to do," he says as his body cringes, his complexion turns a new shade. THIS PROBLEM CAN'T BE DONE." I just calmly repeat "Have you read the directions?" At the top of the page right below the directions was a price chart. "YES!" Tears stream, he puts a death grip on the pencil--"IT CAN"T BE DONE." "Well, when you are ready to be taught, you can let me know."  I walk away. He finally comes to let me know he's ready and that he found the chart.  And I would like to say-then he happily finished the rest.  The opposite is true--the smart aleck comments/disrespect increased, the exaggerated expression of frustration heightened...I finally raised my voice--I matched his disrespect. I shouted and reminded him that some things don't happen after 3 seconds. He must persevere and do things when he doesn't want to. Welcome to life buddy!  (I am not advocating you try this--I am just being real).  
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• Needless to say, this continued the rest of the day. Johnny comes home and by this time I was in a zone...a weird state in which I had tried to remain calm so long I was in a slight zombie state. And did it end then--NO! We continued our work and FINALLY finished around 6:00-more whining/crying, sudden collapses, and just pure tantrums! What in the world? 
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• I must say we have both experienced a day that required discipline and perseverance.  I am not sure if I want to burn that book or be thankful it was a reminder. Regardless, I do hope that as John Gannon grows he can learn to be disciplined and preserve. I can only hope that I can remain sane and not resort to throwing fits every time myself!

Live a Meaningful Life!